Thursday, May 13, 2010

I Am Everything. You Are Everything.

"The weather is always there. Its only our interpretation of the weather that changes." - I wrote this quote down at a time of inspiration. It felt right. Logically it sounds stupid. How close to reality could this quote be? When I thought of it I was changing my interpretation of the weather from cold and hostile to warm an comforting. At least that's what it felt like. It felt like i was choosing to feel the sun as warm or cold on my skin and the wind as loud or quiet in my ears. Could we change the weather further than our interpretation of it? From sunny to storming? Is our interpretation the only thing there is? Does the weather even exist at all? Does anything really exist? What is reality? Can we go with out food for 70 years?( Was that just a story that I needed to hear to get to where I'm going? Do the people I interact with exist at all or are they just another pawn in my reality, another resource for me to use to find out about myself. A different perspective to explore.
Can you find the answers without seeking them? By realizing that there is nothing to seek. That everything you need to know has been in front of you the whole time and the only thing you need to do is become aware of it, to find it. That IT is YOU. And YOU are IT. The things you connect with stronger are the things your ego tries to identify you with. But in reality they are all absolutely the same thing. Nothings really real, The people I interact with on a daily basis, in the street, on the bus, in my classes, the people who call me or talk to me on aim. Everyone is just another pawn I invite into my realty. Another lesson i can choose to listen to or ignore. Is the deepest reason I care about another persons suffering or happiness because I am them and they are me. If they suffer I suffer! Is this why we have empathy in the first place? The reason we can often tell when a person is sad by feeling the emotions they are having not by picking up subtle facial clues and expressions or even by sensing their energy on some quantum level but because when they are having those emotions, it is really us having those emotions. What exists to me is me. Each a different part of me. A different perspective of myself. I am everything. Could we possibly be more connected than we could ever imagine? IS not recycling is wasting yourself. When you litter do you leave trash on yourself. In your world. All harm you do is harm done to yourself. All love and generosity you give, you give to yourself. Treat others how you want to be treated is better advice than I could ever realize because how you treat others is how you are treating yourself. I am everything. You are everything.

Also, Will the answer come to me faster if I seek it? Or will I be able to let it be and find it. Is this all just a waste of time or is it the only way to be enlightened? How do you balance seeking and finding? Don't seek the thing because what your looking for is right in front of you. But to truly go beyond knowing this to understanding it may require seeking. Then you can drop seeking and find. Just like it took the ego to get where we are now and it will take dropping the ego to get where we're going. With adult minds we must again attempt to see everything as we did when we were children. No labels. We are the weather. The weather is us.

Just some Food for thought :)

Edit: I made a tree fall on the way back from my run after this blog post. A big ass tree. It toppled over and landed on a barbwire fence. As I was running back I had a huge understanding of what the blog post could mean and an implication it had in my life. A place I was seeking rather than letting be/finding. A Huge surge of Power filled my being and I got a huge smile across my face. I felt Free and invincible, In control. Then the wind picked up, blew dust in my face and the tree made a loud sound crashing to the ground 20 feet behind me. It was attempting to distract me from my thought. (Or reinforcing it deeper my head? After all life is plotting to make me happy right.) That, or it was just a coincidence. Do I choose the more empowering belief or the one closer to "reality"?

Note: Running not only keeps you in shape it frees your mind.

Monday, May 10, 2010

Zumba - Breakin the mold

Pushed the comfort zone to another level today by attending a Zumba class. Was running some errands with a friend named Kayla and told her half jokingly I would go to Zumba with her and Jodi when they went later. As I thought about being there I noticed myself feeling awkward. I could tell if i did this I would feel uncomfortable. And ive been trying to live by the rule that If it makes you feel uncomfortable, Do it! This is something I never would have done a year ago. maybe even a week ago. I'm a little surprised I went (But not at the same time, weird). I committed to it right there and promised her I would go. Knowing I couldn't back out made the 3 hours before the class a lot easier. I didn't sit there and think about all the negative things that might happen during the class. Each thing I framed in a positive way. I'm going to be the only guy in a class of who knows how many girls, Tight. I'm not going to know how to do the dances and ill look like a fool trying, Awesome chance to practice not caring how I look to other people. I didn't let the normal negative thoughts get me down. What was the point? It was too late to turn back. Instead I got excited about the class. I thought about all the new opportunities it could open up. I could learn how to dance better and It would expand my comfort zone. Turns out there were a lot of times I could have felt very awkward but as soon as it crept in I smiled, enjoyed it and it went away. I kept reminding myself it didn't matter. OF COURSE I'm not going to be good at it! Its my first class!! and that's OK. I used to go into things like this and be uncomfortable If I wasn't one of the top people right off the bat. It usually caused me to goof around and not take thing thing serious. I wouldn't give myself a chance to improve. I'm going to commit to going to more classes (hopefully pick up some dance classes, salsa anyone?). I can see a ton of benefits. If I can become comfortable dancing like a fool in front of a bunch of girls, where I stick out like a sore thumb, then other things that might have made me uncomfortable before wont be shit. Every new thing you learn how to do helps your brain grow and get better at learning other new things. I can tell that I am super tight when it comes to dancing. I'm mechanical, I gotz no rhythm. If keep going to classes I can tell I will make a lot of improvements. This 'learned looseness' and mind-body connection that you must develop to be good at Zumba (or any other form of dance) will help in a ton of other areas. Every-thing is connected. I was better at the end of the songs than I was at the beginning, and after I can stop worrying about the basic things like where to put my hands and what beat is going to come next I will be able to improve my groove.

Thursday, May 6, 2010


Why are conversations with people you don't know weird?
What is it that makes you uncomfortable when you don't know someone? its like being unsure about anything always causes anxiety/stress. People avoid the stress (uncomfortableness?) at any cost. people wont do anything unless they are pretty close to sure they know how it will turn out. And the way they feel like its going to turn out has to suit their interests.

How can you get people to become more comfortable in conversations? Prolly become more comfortable yourself. Get enough experience in conversations that you are confident that what ever happens you will be able to deal with it, you wont have awkward pauses and that any conversation you get into is going to be fun and fulfilling. After you get that believe I'm sure you will transfer that state to the other person and help them get there as well.

People fear the unknown. In conversations the unknown is the next topic of discussion, how the person will interpret what your saying and how the person will respond. The fear comes from not knowing how your response will be judged. So as you build trust you can build a closer level on conversation.