Ive feel like Ive been pretty stagnant lately. Like i know what i need to do and know the path i need to start walking and the daily habits i need to get into in order to live to my highest potential but there's this constant voice in my head telling me it's OK to do whats easy. Its ok to sleep in and relax. But my belief that i need to work to achieve makes me feel the best when I'm striving to achieve a goal. I stop judging people and i just enjoy the world around me. I worry that i have been starting to many small projects and reading so many different books as a way to distract myself from finishing any of them. Maybe its a good things to get a ton of projects together in the direction of the larger project so that i can grow that much faster and when i have an obstacle in one area it will allow me to focus on something else until a path is found around that obstacle. I think i am at a point where i have the foundation laid. I have the blueprint of what i want to do basically set up. I have the understanding of the mindset needed to complete the project but not quite the full confidence in that mindset. I still have doubts. I have the vision to make the project sweet. I have the drive to see the project to completion and now all there is to do is drop all the minor distractions and do my work. My work needs to be the primary focus. around that enjoying peoples company, pursuing life experiences and reading to enhance my knowledge can compliment my primary purpose but i must not focus my beam of intent as to not be distracted by the secondary things that can be better left to the times i am resting from my primary purpose. Today i have a choice between going up north with friends and having fun this weekend at the cost of being pissed at myself for being lazy or I can go to hockey tonight, skip going up north and spend all Saturday learning how to make websites so i can bring my ideas to the world. But if i kept my intention and went up north would someone who already knows how to make websites be brought into my reality and the same outcome achieved? In this way does it matter if i stress myself to work or if i just live life to the fullest. Hopefully Steve Pavlinas current 30 day trial will shed some light on this predicament. For now I'm going to choose work because i do not yet have full trust in my powers of manifestation. I know that if i procrastinate on working out that i will get fat and feel shitty. Why would it be any different if i procrastinate on working.
BARTZ....OUT
Friday, July 30, 2010
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Ping Pong
How you think somebody is going to think about something, Is how they are going to think about it. If you do something 'weird' and you think someone is going to think its weird then that person will think its weird, you will project your thoughts on how to think about it into their state. If you deep down believe that they will think its tight as hell then they will feel that think its tight as hell. You have control. Truly believing that what you do is going to perceived the same way you perceive it and not misinterpreted the ways you might feel like it could be misinterpreted is the hard part. Damn, I hope that didn't get misinterpreted.
Living in the moment is huge. once you realize that you can trust yourself and not have an outcome dependence on anything that happens you can start to view the things that happen to you as the exact things you needed to happen to you in order to grow to the next level. Or maybe that stems only from my desire to grow to the next level. And sense i have that desire all the things in my life that happen to me result in me perpetuating that desire. If someone has the desire to feel miserable then all the things that happen to them are going to perpetuate that desire. They will all make them feel miserable in the same way that they make me feel like i used them to evolve to the next level.
What you think you are capable of is exactly what your capable of. If you are learning to juggle it will be very hard to do 100 juggles with 4 pins in a row on the first try. You don't really believe you are capable of juggling 100 times in a row on the first try. It takes practice to get to 100 throw. What is practice? Its proving to yourself you are capable of doing 100 juggles in a row. And that starts with proving to yourself you are capable of doing 2 juggles in a row and then 3. and for the quick learner it means pushing yourself and having confidence that you can do 2 in a row then 10 in a row.
A blog is me writing a note to myself. But not only to myself to all of the selves of me out in the world that are able to find it. All the selves out there that are at the same place as me. and i can thank the selves of me before me who are writing to all their other selves giving them guidance. Each little projection of me is out there for me to interpret in the way i see fit. The way my consciousness sees fit. My consciousness creates everything and everyone in my world as a vibration of my inner most beliefs. Where do these beliefs come from? Are they deep down socially conditioned things, but then social conditioning itself must come from your belief. Where do you formulate your first beliefs? Are fist beliefs an illusion in the same way that past and future are illusions and the only thing that's real is the now? Where do we get things in the now? Where does everything i have now, like this tea come from? Must have been a previous now that was nice enough to give it to the current now. Is that why its so important to give because when you can give to other people and take on a overall giving attitude you will tent to give yourself things in the now.
Living in the moment is huge. once you realize that you can trust yourself and not have an outcome dependence on anything that happens you can start to view the things that happen to you as the exact things you needed to happen to you in order to grow to the next level. Or maybe that stems only from my desire to grow to the next level. And sense i have that desire all the things in my life that happen to me result in me perpetuating that desire. If someone has the desire to feel miserable then all the things that happen to them are going to perpetuate that desire. They will all make them feel miserable in the same way that they make me feel like i used them to evolve to the next level.
What you think you are capable of is exactly what your capable of. If you are learning to juggle it will be very hard to do 100 juggles with 4 pins in a row on the first try. You don't really believe you are capable of juggling 100 times in a row on the first try. It takes practice to get to 100 throw. What is practice? Its proving to yourself you are capable of doing 100 juggles in a row. And that starts with proving to yourself you are capable of doing 2 juggles in a row and then 3. and for the quick learner it means pushing yourself and having confidence that you can do 2 in a row then 10 in a row.
A blog is me writing a note to myself. But not only to myself to all of the selves of me out in the world that are able to find it. All the selves out there that are at the same place as me. and i can thank the selves of me before me who are writing to all their other selves giving them guidance. Each little projection of me is out there for me to interpret in the way i see fit. The way my consciousness sees fit. My consciousness creates everything and everyone in my world as a vibration of my inner most beliefs. Where do these beliefs come from? Are they deep down socially conditioned things, but then social conditioning itself must come from your belief. Where do you formulate your first beliefs? Are fist beliefs an illusion in the same way that past and future are illusions and the only thing that's real is the now? Where do we get things in the now? Where does everything i have now, like this tea come from? Must have been a previous now that was nice enough to give it to the current now. Is that why its so important to give because when you can give to other people and take on a overall giving attitude you will tent to give yourself things in the now.
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Being offended is a choice.
As a society we should try harder to not become offended rather than to not offend. Everyone is so scared not to offend other people that we tip toe around people feeling. People tend to look for reasons to take things personal and get upset, maybe it makes them feel important. People can learn that other peoples opinions are only a different perspective. Instead of tying up this perspective in once self image and thinking it takes away from their path, they can look at the ways the perspective can add value to it. Take the offensive thing with a grain of salt. Don't let your ego feel damaged and take it personally. Maybe there could actually be something to learn from a different opinion or criticism. In the end its important to understand that the criticism reflects more about the criticizer than what is being criticized. Could the society raise its self esteem to a point where the majority of people choose not to become offended? If this were the case overly offensive people would lose their power. They wont be able to judge people in order to be a level above them. Any previously offensive things will turn constructive. We will be able to use our criticisms as a way to build each other up rather than tare each other down.
Monday, June 7, 2010
Medication: Not a Quick fix
Our culture is too quick to give children medication for their “problems.”
Kids are board in class so instead of giving them something that motivated and interests them to want to learn we drug them into becoming lifeless drones and wipe their spunk and creativity in order to get them to conform to societies standers that enforce the hierarchy and benefit the people in control.
We need to raise our kids with high self esteem and not use them as a way to feel better about our own emotional issues as adults. Treating the superficial issues like depression and ADD with drugs is not the solution.
Low confidence Kids will grow into low confidence adults, which raise more yet more low confidence kids. We cannot break this cycle by covering up the issue with medication. We cannot change our biology in the short term. We need to change how we think about things in the long term in order to increase our happiness and find our individual passions. This is all that is needed to solve a majority of the psychological issues that people misinterpret as problems rather than seeing them as a sign that a person’s lifestyle is in-congruent with their biological needs.
Quick fixes don’t work. We need to treat the underlying issue. We need to give our kids guidance, choice and encouragement so they can do what THEY are passionate about and live up to their full potential rather than a society defined definition of success. We cannot keep drugging them so it’s easier to guide them to what society thinks they should do.
Kids are board in class so instead of giving them something that motivated and interests them to want to learn we drug them into becoming lifeless drones and wipe their spunk and creativity in order to get them to conform to societies standers that enforce the hierarchy and benefit the people in control.
We need to raise our kids with high self esteem and not use them as a way to feel better about our own emotional issues as adults. Treating the superficial issues like depression and ADD with drugs is not the solution.
Low confidence Kids will grow into low confidence adults, which raise more yet more low confidence kids. We cannot break this cycle by covering up the issue with medication. We cannot change our biology in the short term. We need to change how we think about things in the long term in order to increase our happiness and find our individual passions. This is all that is needed to solve a majority of the psychological issues that people misinterpret as problems rather than seeing them as a sign that a person’s lifestyle is in-congruent with their biological needs.
Quick fixes don’t work. We need to treat the underlying issue. We need to give our kids guidance, choice and encouragement so they can do what THEY are passionate about and live up to their full potential rather than a society defined definition of success. We cannot keep drugging them so it’s easier to guide them to what society thinks they should do.
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
I am ME
This last weekend has been very powerful. I have realized a lot of things. I have realized how important the people in my life have been and how much I already knew that but didn’t acknowledge it. I realized how great a person my brother is and how important he has been in my life and how important I have been in his. I realized that he is and ALWAYS will be my best friend. The times we have shared together have build a connection so strong and for some reason I had a resistance to it. I realized that I have been very bad at showing the people I love and care about how much they truly mean to me. I realized that I have always been the person that I want to be. I realized that the only thing holding myself back was I. When I was a kid I was me. And as I grew up I let other people influence who I am. My first TRUE passion was hockey. I loved the control and freedom it gave me. I played it for ME. I spend anytime I could on the ice, with a stick and ball, teaching my friends about it, going to hockey camps, shooting pucks against the garage or in the basement, stick handling, roller bladeing, anything to do with hockey. For me. Because I LOVED it! I didn’t give a fuck what other people thought about it. It was me. I was me. I lost a lot of respect for myself on an unconscious level because as I grew up I let people’s opinion hold me back from what I was passionate about. I let my fear of their rejection stop me from doing what I Loved. I let them put doubts in my ability. I stopped playing the game for me. I started playing it for them. This stopped me from living up to my potential. I am grateful I faced it. I am grateful for the lessons I learned from not living up to my potential. And I know I needed this to get where I am going. Now I can put it behind me.
I will never forget the time we won state. Not the championship game, but the game right before it. The feeling I got when I scored the overtime goal. I will never forget what the roof of that old barn rink looked like. The lights shining down on me as I was filled with power, passion, joy, freedom, life. Staring up at the ceiling like I was the only person in the world. I made it happen. I was in control. The game started off with me scoring the first goal early in the game. The opposing team tied it up and then took the lead. They were winning 2-1. It was the 3rd period and the puck was in our zone. I took it from a teammate behind the net and skated it from end to end to score with 6 seconds left. I tied the game at 2-2 to bring it into overtime. I scored the overtime goal to get us to the championship. I was in control of my reality. It was an amazing feeling. Somewhere I lost that control and with it I lost respect for myself. I did this by letting the things that made me uncomfortable hold me back from doing what I was passionate about. I let the things take away my control and stop me from being free. I think this is why I am on this current journey. A journey to expand my comfort zone to a place where I can handle ANYTHING that might hold me back from my passion. A journey to truly be free of other peoples opinion of me so ‘I can be me’. A journey to find out who I AM. To embrace who I AM. To love who I AM. Just like when I was a kid. I am ME. I am already everything I want to be. I already have everything I need. I am Me. I will no longer let anyone, anything, or myself hold me back from living my passion. Life is wonderful.
I will never forget the time we won state. Not the championship game, but the game right before it. The feeling I got when I scored the overtime goal. I will never forget what the roof of that old barn rink looked like. The lights shining down on me as I was filled with power, passion, joy, freedom, life. Staring up at the ceiling like I was the only person in the world. I made it happen. I was in control. The game started off with me scoring the first goal early in the game. The opposing team tied it up and then took the lead. They were winning 2-1. It was the 3rd period and the puck was in our zone. I took it from a teammate behind the net and skated it from end to end to score with 6 seconds left. I tied the game at 2-2 to bring it into overtime. I scored the overtime goal to get us to the championship. I was in control of my reality. It was an amazing feeling. Somewhere I lost that control and with it I lost respect for myself. I did this by letting the things that made me uncomfortable hold me back from doing what I was passionate about. I let the things take away my control and stop me from being free. I think this is why I am on this current journey. A journey to expand my comfort zone to a place where I can handle ANYTHING that might hold me back from my passion. A journey to truly be free of other peoples opinion of me so ‘I can be me’. A journey to find out who I AM. To embrace who I AM. To love who I AM. Just like when I was a kid. I am ME. I am already everything I want to be. I already have everything I need. I am Me. I will no longer let anyone, anything, or myself hold me back from living my passion. Life is wonderful.
Thursday, May 13, 2010
I Am Everything. You Are Everything.
"The weather is always there. Its only our interpretation of the weather that changes." - I wrote this quote down at a time of inspiration. It felt right. Logically it sounds stupid. How close to reality could this quote be? When I thought of it I was changing my interpretation of the weather from cold and hostile to warm an comforting. At least that's what it felt like. It felt like i was choosing to feel the sun as warm or cold on my skin and the wind as loud or quiet in my ears. Could we change the weather further than our interpretation of it? From sunny to storming? Is our interpretation the only thing there is? Does the weather even exist at all? Does anything really exist? What is reality? Can we go with out food for 70 years?(http://cli.gs/JtRLHr) Was that just a story that I needed to hear to get to where I'm going? Do the people I interact with exist at all or are they just another pawn in my reality, another resource for me to use to find out about myself. A different perspective to explore.
Can you find the answers without seeking them? By realizing that there is nothing to seek. That everything you need to know has been in front of you the whole time and the only thing you need to do is become aware of it, to find it. That IT is YOU. And YOU are IT. The things you connect with stronger are the things your ego tries to identify you with. But in reality they are all absolutely the same thing. Nothings really real, The people I interact with on a daily basis, in the street, on the bus, in my classes, the people who call me or talk to me on aim. Everyone is just another pawn I invite into my realty. Another lesson i can choose to listen to or ignore. Is the deepest reason I care about another persons suffering or happiness because I am them and they are me. If they suffer I suffer! Is this why we have empathy in the first place? The reason we can often tell when a person is sad by feeling the emotions they are having not by picking up subtle facial clues and expressions or even by sensing their energy on some quantum level but because when they are having those emotions, it is really us having those emotions. What exists to me is me. Each a different part of me. A different perspective of myself. I am everything. Could we possibly be more connected than we could ever imagine? IS not recycling is wasting yourself. When you litter do you leave trash on yourself. In your world. All harm you do is harm done to yourself. All love and generosity you give, you give to yourself. Treat others how you want to be treated is better advice than I could ever realize because how you treat others is how you are treating yourself. I am everything. You are everything.
Also, Will the answer come to me faster if I seek it? Or will I be able to let it be and find it. Is this all just a waste of time or is it the only way to be enlightened? How do you balance seeking and finding? Don't seek the thing because what your looking for is right in front of you. But to truly go beyond knowing this to understanding it may require seeking. Then you can drop seeking and find. Just like it took the ego to get where we are now and it will take dropping the ego to get where we're going. With adult minds we must again attempt to see everything as we did when we were children. No labels. We are the weather. The weather is us.
Just some Food for thought :)
Edit: I made a tree fall on the way back from my run after this blog post. A big ass tree. It toppled over and landed on a barbwire fence. As I was running back I had a huge understanding of what the blog post could mean and an implication it had in my life. A place I was seeking rather than letting be/finding. A Huge surge of Power filled my being and I got a huge smile across my face. I felt Free and invincible, In control. Then the wind picked up, blew dust in my face and the tree made a loud sound crashing to the ground 20 feet behind me. It was attempting to distract me from my thought. (Or reinforcing it deeper my head? After all life is plotting to make me happy right.) That, or it was just a coincidence. Do I choose the more empowering belief or the one closer to "reality"?
Note: Running not only keeps you in shape it frees your mind.
Can you find the answers without seeking them? By realizing that there is nothing to seek. That everything you need to know has been in front of you the whole time and the only thing you need to do is become aware of it, to find it. That IT is YOU. And YOU are IT. The things you connect with stronger are the things your ego tries to identify you with. But in reality they are all absolutely the same thing. Nothings really real, The people I interact with on a daily basis, in the street, on the bus, in my classes, the people who call me or talk to me on aim. Everyone is just another pawn I invite into my realty. Another lesson i can choose to listen to or ignore. Is the deepest reason I care about another persons suffering or happiness because I am them and they are me. If they suffer I suffer! Is this why we have empathy in the first place? The reason we can often tell when a person is sad by feeling the emotions they are having not by picking up subtle facial clues and expressions or even by sensing their energy on some quantum level but because when they are having those emotions, it is really us having those emotions. What exists to me is me. Each a different part of me. A different perspective of myself. I am everything. Could we possibly be more connected than we could ever imagine? IS not recycling is wasting yourself. When you litter do you leave trash on yourself. In your world. All harm you do is harm done to yourself. All love and generosity you give, you give to yourself. Treat others how you want to be treated is better advice than I could ever realize because how you treat others is how you are treating yourself. I am everything. You are everything.
Also, Will the answer come to me faster if I seek it? Or will I be able to let it be and find it. Is this all just a waste of time or is it the only way to be enlightened? How do you balance seeking and finding? Don't seek the thing because what your looking for is right in front of you. But to truly go beyond knowing this to understanding it may require seeking. Then you can drop seeking and find. Just like it took the ego to get where we are now and it will take dropping the ego to get where we're going. With adult minds we must again attempt to see everything as we did when we were children. No labels. We are the weather. The weather is us.
Just some Food for thought :)
Edit: I made a tree fall on the way back from my run after this blog post. A big ass tree. It toppled over and landed on a barbwire fence. As I was running back I had a huge understanding of what the blog post could mean and an implication it had in my life. A place I was seeking rather than letting be/finding. A Huge surge of Power filled my being and I got a huge smile across my face. I felt Free and invincible, In control. Then the wind picked up, blew dust in my face and the tree made a loud sound crashing to the ground 20 feet behind me. It was attempting to distract me from my thought. (Or reinforcing it deeper my head? After all life is plotting to make me happy right.) That, or it was just a coincidence. Do I choose the more empowering belief or the one closer to "reality"?
Note: Running not only keeps you in shape it frees your mind.
Monday, May 10, 2010
Zumba - Breakin the mold
Pushed the comfort zone to another level today by attending a Zumba class. Was running some errands with a friend named Kayla and told her half jokingly I would go to Zumba with her and Jodi when they went later. As I thought about being there I noticed myself feeling awkward. I could tell if i did this I would feel uncomfortable. And ive been trying to live by the rule that If it makes you feel uncomfortable, Do it! This is something I never would have done a year ago. maybe even a week ago. I'm a little surprised I went (But not at the same time, weird). I committed to it right there and promised her I would go. Knowing I couldn't back out made the 3 hours before the class a lot easier. I didn't sit there and think about all the negative things that might happen during the class. Each thing I framed in a positive way. I'm going to be the only guy in a class of who knows how many girls, Tight. I'm not going to know how to do the dances and ill look like a fool trying, Awesome chance to practice not caring how I look to other people. I didn't let the normal negative thoughts get me down. What was the point? It was too late to turn back. Instead I got excited about the class. I thought about all the new opportunities it could open up. I could learn how to dance better and It would expand my comfort zone. Turns out there were a lot of times I could have felt very awkward but as soon as it crept in I smiled, enjoyed it and it went away. I kept reminding myself it didn't matter. OF COURSE I'm not going to be good at it! Its my first class!! and that's OK. I used to go into things like this and be uncomfortable If I wasn't one of the top people right off the bat. It usually caused me to goof around and not take thing thing serious. I wouldn't give myself a chance to improve. I'm going to commit to going to more classes (hopefully pick up some dance classes, salsa anyone?). I can see a ton of benefits. If I can become comfortable dancing like a fool in front of a bunch of girls, where I stick out like a sore thumb, then other things that might have made me uncomfortable before wont be shit. Every new thing you learn how to do helps your brain grow and get better at learning other new things. I can tell that I am super tight when it comes to dancing. I'm mechanical, I gotz no rhythm. If keep going to classes I can tell I will make a lot of improvements. This 'learned looseness' and mind-body connection that you must develop to be good at Zumba (or any other form of dance) will help in a ton of other areas. Every-thing is connected. I was better at the end of the songs than I was at the beginning, and after I can stop worrying about the basic things like where to put my hands and what beat is going to come next I will be able to improve my groove.
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